Here’s a reality—with a big problem: In many relationships, at home and at work, opposites attract. But here’s the problem: Soon, they start doing opposite things! While people initially complement each other and bring out positive aspects of the other person, their differences almost inevitably lead to conflict.   

One behavior that a lot of duos differ is in regard to detail-orientation and tidiness, which we call Need for Order in our Teamalytics* assessment. I’m very organized and methodical and my wife is…well, not! She’s amazing, but her strength isn’t meticulousness, and she has been known to misplace things. 

The interesting thing is that our wiring on this trait has been incredibly consistent for over two decades of marriage, and yet our conflict has lessened significantly. So, if our behavior hasn’t changed, our attitudes must have. Here are questions for both ends of the spectrum to help gauge your attitude: 

Questions for those who may have a “Lower Need for Order”: 

1. How well do you see that higher Need for Order people are beneficial in that they possess strengths such as: Organized, Thorough, Structured, Planful, and Precise? 
2. How well do you see the risks of your lower Need for Order tendency such as: Being less organized, Difficulty tracking details, Being less list-oriented or system-focused?  

 Questions for those who may have a “Higher Need for Order”: 

1. How well do you see that lower Need for Order people are beneficial in that they possess strengths such as: Comfortable in undefined situations, can spin multiple plates, Adaptable? 
2. How well do you see the risks of your higher Need for Order tendency, such as: lacking spontaneity, being overly tactical versus strategic, and slowing things down when caught up in details?  

I think I might print this article and give it to my wife…I just hope she doesn’t misplace it! 

*This is a sample of some of the content covered in the Teamalytics Initial Team Workshop.   

Team Leaders, try this with your team: have everyone read the content above and discuss the following: 

1. Are you higher or more moderate/lower on Need for Order?
2. Who is someone different from you in this area whom you can be too quick to judge?
    

Dr. Chris J White is the Chief Science Officer at Teamalytics, and in each edition of Growth Guide, he will leverage his coaching of over 15,000 executives and his PhD in Statistics to bring you actionable insights to help with the people challenges in your workplace and life. Bio Here